An Excerpt

At some point we all lie. In these modern times, in an age of Internet dating, socializing and hooking up, it frequently requires some shading of the truth. The fact is, the New Internet Etiquette is both a blessing and a curse. Never before has the ability to make friends, make love and find sex been accomplished quicker. The most successful gay websites have this potential interaction. The downside is: romance is dead. There is little mystery left in the pursuit of sex, or love. We are now permitted to be as explicit and demanding as we like. It's called shopping. We shop for sex and love. Many people have a list of their needs. It's important to grasp at the subtext: people are sending messages about their shopping list. There is a lexicon for this and it is to be found in words like "chill", "discreet" "NSA", and even the suspicious "bi". Chill, for example means that you are likely young seeking young. Old men don't chill. It's a way of suggesting that we get together without intent, with that distinct but lazy possibility of having sex. Discreet is always a danger sign: This person is likely in the closet or cheating on his lover. They are afraid of something. No one has a explanation why anyone would feel the need to tell the world they are bisexual other than it looks good on paper (or screen), hints at a liberal view of sexuality, and holds a certain allure to many homosexuals. Is it any wonder people are finding ways around the truth when the demands are so stringent? Here's an example pulled from a typical Craigslist ad: You you should be SMOOTH and THIN/ SKINNY or AVG BUILT or MUSCULAR 20-30. What if you are 32, have a slight fat deposit around the middle and a little tuff of hair on your chest? Should you answer this ad? Absolutely! But be prepared to fib, a little. Remember, horny people are usually willing to set aside some of their demands when the moment comes. The fact is, you can't always get what you want, but you can indeed, get what you need.

PHOTOSHOPPING THE TRUTH
Age is certainly the greatest fib ever told on the Internet. Men, especially older gay men lie constantly: they have to. At some point in the sexual life of everyone, they begin to lose their appeal. Age happens. For most men, it’s a slow unraveling: Hairlines recede, laugh lines remain after the laughter, and gravity, that invisible sledgehammer of physics keeps pushing us closer and closer to the Earth and we simply get wider and wider.
Luckily, Adobe invented Photoshop, to combat all the forces of nature. With Photoshop, we can smooth lines, frowns and inches. We can create hair where it should be, and it’s far less expensive. So as images are jettisoned across the vast universe of desire and longing, anyone with some graphic skill can artfully correct the intrusions of age. It’s all-good when innocently bantering with the truth in a situation where a physical appearance is not required. But, what about when it is? What if you actually set up a meeting and you have to show up, as you really are? Your guest may gasp as they ask themselves quietly, “Who is this person, not like the one in the picture they sent me?” It is always best to resort to reasonable explanations: I had such a busy week, I’m so tired. I photograph much younger than I look, or the proverbial favorite, it was the lighting. Remember, horny people are usually forgiving.
The same can be said about the purely sexual encounter, where because of the new sexual etiquette, we can now ask, what we always wanted to ask: how big? People have a tendency to round out the numbers, so a 6½" becomes a 7 incher. These are called Internet inches. No one really believes anyone is going to pull out a measuring tape during sex, so the missing ½ inch is likely to be overlooked as a detail. Again, Photoshop, in the initial Internet introduction can be skillfully used to add dimension and length to any image (it's the clone stamp). The first rule of fibbing on the Internet is be reasonable. Don’t add three inches—that will certainly be noted, measuring tape or not! The same can be said about fibbing about one’s age, be reasonable. If you're 55, don’t suggest that your 35, even if your best friends and Mom tell you how good you look for your age. Keep it in within the range of reality. A good rule is never over ten years younger. All the cosmetic surgery, the jars of Olay, exercise and make-up cannot take you back to an age where they played an entirely different soundtrack to the culture. But, lets get back to the penis. You have suggested and sent an image that is not quite anatomically correct. Now what?  The rule here is don’t lie over an inch. It will be noticed. There is a difference between five inches and six, look at a ruler. No one (some aggressive size-queens are the exception) is going to toss you out of the bedroom because you added a little length and girth. The fact is, quite often both people realize they both have fibbed about it and so begins the beginning of a wonderful relationship.